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Grieving On . . . 

Grief doesn't end but rather continues as part of our story

Rest & Rearranging

11/7/2019

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No matter how many times I rearrange the living room there is a still an empty spot. A spot where Josh’s bed was for several weeks as his health declined. The place where I leaned over and kissed and hugged him often, where we shared life.

I have moved chairs and couches around but the space still is there and so are the memories. Our home continues to be a huge reminder that Josh isn’t here. Often I want to be anywhere but here.

The only way to get rid of this visual reminder is to sell the house, which isn’t the best idea at the moment - or is it?

I miss Josh a lot. Tears happen often on my way to and from work and at home in this place that has so often been a place of comfort. There is comfort still yet great sorrow which is not comfortable.

I continue to process and grieve on, acknowledging that there are just days when I don’t feel better about any of this. Today was the sorrow was thick - like a heavy blanket. It wears me out and does quite make sense. Why I am so tired? Because as I’ve said before, grief is exhausting.

For today, I just rest in this - not trying to rush past it but pausing and feeling it deeply, hoping that in doing so healing will continue.

I know there is hope for tomorrow and joy to be discovered.

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    Author: Jenn

    Hi! It's Jenn Brown, writing my story that is now slightly different as we enter a season of new grief. On September 30, 2019, my dear husband Josh passed away after battling brain cancer. 

    Life for me weirdly continues on and I'm continuing to share my heart and journey here in this space as a way to process and hopefully encourage others in their grief journey also. It's not easy for any of us.   

    Read more about Josh's cancer battle here.

    Follow me: #jennbrownadventures
    #grievingon

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