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Grieving On . . . 

Grief doesn't end but rather continues as part of our story

Grief on the Big Screen

11/27/2019

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Whew! I might have to stop going to movies. Earlier this week Mr. Rogers and today Frozen 2. Both movies had a big emotional impact. If you missed the earlier blog on Mr Rogers read it here. 

Maybe it’s surprising, maybe not, but I cried more watching Frozen II than Mr. Rogers.


[Slight movie spoiler alert or pre-warning] Not knowing what I was getting into with the plot but surrounded with great friends and their kids (Thanks Kellers!) at the IMAX, we laughed together and breathed deep as a scene where one character “drifts away” entered the storyline. This moment was challenging, although in my movie mind I expected the character would come back so that helped a little. What really got me though was the next song, “The Next Right Thing” as Ana sings about grief and trying to go on to what's next. Here are a few lyrics*:

I've seen dark before, but not like this
This is cold, this is empty, this is numb
The life I knew is over; the lights are out
Hello darkness: I'm ready to succumb

I follow you around (I always have)
But you've gone to a place I cannot find
This grief has a gravity, it pulls me down
But a tiny voice whispers in my mind

You are lost, hope is gone
But you must go on
And do the next right thing


I connected with the heart and emotion of this song greatly. While my hope is not centered on a person, but on God who is always with me, there's still a part of me that has lost some hope. I connect with the words, “the life I knew is over” and do often feel the gravity of grief. Grief that feels dark, empty, numb and uncertain. Grief that has me looking for a person who isn't here with me today. Grief that makes me teary-eyed.

The song continues and becomes an anthem for moving forward – similar lyrics are in my own heart and mind most days.

I won't look too far ahead
It's too much for me to take
But break it down to this next breath, this next step
This next choice is one that I can make


A line early in the movie offered this advice, “Be prepared. Just when you think you found your way, life will throw you onto a new path.”

Life certainly has thrown me on a new path at a time when I thought Josh and I were kind-of finding our way. As I write this on the eve of Thanksgiving, it’s hard to be thankful for what’s happened this year. At the same time, I can’t be thankful enough for the time I had with Josh and for the people who have loved and supported us so wonderfully through it all. So what do I do here and now? 

“... I'll walk through this night,
Stumbling blindly toward the light
And do the next right thing” 


For me this means, continuing to trust God with the rest of my story. It means trusting God's Word that is filled with so much hope and truth as I stumble on day by day, moment by moment.

"You will make known to me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
In Your right hand there are pleasures forever."

- Psalm 16:11

__________
​*View all the song lyrics all here or watch the lyric/music video below: 

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    Author: Jenn

    Hi! It's Jenn Brown, writing my story that is now slightly different as we enter a season of new grief. On September 30, 2019, my dear husband Josh passed away after battling brain cancer. 

    Life for me weirdly continues on and I'm continuing to share my heart and journey here in this space as a way to process and hopefully encourage others in their grief journey also. It's not easy for any of us.   

    Read more about Josh's cancer battle here.

    Follow me: #jennbrownadventures
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