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Grieving On . . . 

Grief doesn't end but rather continues as part of our story

Carving out Grief

10/6/2019

1 Comment

 
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​The exhaustion hit last night and carried into today. For the first time in days, we didn’t have to plan or do anything. Friends and family, still around, gathered as we continued to share stories, laugh and cry - with these three things on a repeating loop.

The celebration of life service, evening potluck and lantern release were beautiful and so perfect.
Read more about this.

As I woke the day after services, a few tears still trickled down, but my heart swelled with gratitude as I thought about our friends who stepped up to support us in such big ways through all of this. It was beautiful to see friends honoring my husband in creative and thoughtful ways all across the country. I love that we have friends everywhere. 

Much of the day was spent with resting with family and laughing with friends who met each other for the first time this weekend. Old and newer friends blending together - how cool. It rained all day long, which seemed so fitting for how I felt. A big raincloud, representing great sorrow lingered over us; we trudged on through it with soaked feet, laughter and tears intertwined.  

We ended the night by painting and carving pumpkins. I teared up a few times at my mother-in-laws, which is a hard place to be, even though I love it. My brother-in-law thanked God for the food and Josh and as we said, "Amen," my face was streaked with tears – again. We read through cards and memories shared with us and agreed this is going to tough. And we're going to miss Josh A LOT.

Whew - deep breaths. 


A new season sits here on the horizon. A new season with unexpected tears at any moment, layers of grief, friendship that will continue to grow and many unknowns. It's a season to lean in and trust God all the more, but in many ways, I find myself asking, "How do I do this?"

I will consider all your works
    and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”

Your ways, God, are holy.
    What god is as great as our God?

– Psalm 77:12-13

1 Comment
LoisJean Kinney
10/7/2019 07:04:08 am

Thank you Jennifer for the way in which you shared through all of this. Even though I only know you through Nathan and Alicia, you have helped me feel your sorrow as well as your love for Josh and the Lord. I know the Lord will continue to use you and He will continue to use Josh, his story and his life. I know that the Lord will be right beside you because you will always want Him to be. May you sense His direction wherever He chooses to lead you in the future.
LoisJean Kinney

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    Author: Jenn

    Hi! It's Jenn Brown, writing my story that is now slightly different as we enter a season of new grief. On September 30, 2019, my dear husband Josh passed away after battling brain cancer. 

    Life for me weirdly continues on and I'm continuing to share my heart and journey here in this space as a way to process and hopefully encourage others in their grief journey also. It's not easy for any of us.   

    Read more about Josh's cancer battle here.

    Follow me: #jennbrownadventures
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