Jenn Brown Adventures
  • Home
    • Send a Message
  • Grieving On
  • Jennifer Brown
  • JourneywithJosh
  • Josh Brown
  • Traveling A Browns

Grieving On . . . 

Grief doesn't end but rather continues as part of our story

Frozen Feelings

11/11/2019

0 Comments

 
Picture
On Sunday, it was mid 70s, a perfect day for hanging out with family and friends and even some outlet mall shopping in Branson where I got the most wonderful coat just in time for winter weather which happened on Monday. The temperature plummeted all day and the area turned into a slick winter wonderland of ice, sleet, freezing rain and a little snow in 24 hours. As everyone at work kind of freaked out about the weather, I thought, "Is this something worth being crazy about?"

While I did enjoy leaving early and work from home before the roads got worse (which they did) I also felt disappointed that I couldn't call Josh to convince him to also come home early and snuggle with me on the couch. In fact, most of the afternoon and evening, I just felt weirdly frozen in my grief - not quite sure how I felt about the day. I made some house progress with cleaning and fixed up the mantle decor that I had grown to dislike very much over the past week, switched around more photos and pondered this new season of life even more.

My brain is still in overdrive, thinking about Josh, life decisions and what it looks like to move forward or rather grieve onward. There really isn't a roadmap. Even as I read the stories of others who have or are now experiencing similar grief, I can't duplicate their journey but rather continue on in my story. Most of the time the big question in my mind is, "What should I do now?" I rarely have a good answer which leads to the "frozen feelings."

I pray often that God will continue to guide my next steps, that he will continue to shine a light on the path forward. I know he will, but how and when it will actually come together in my mind is still a mystery.

Day by day, Lord show me the way - that sounds like a song lyric. 


For this day, at least I'll look stylish while I'm frozen because of the weather or my emotions.

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.
- Psalm 119:105

0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Author: Jenn

    Hi! It's Jenn Brown, writing my story that is now slightly different as we enter a season of new grief. On September 30, 2019, my dear husband Josh passed away after battling brain cancer. 

    Life for me weirdly continues on and I'm continuing to share my heart and journey here in this space as a way to process and hopefully encourage others in their grief journey also. It's not easy for any of us.   

    Read more about Josh's cancer battle here.

    Follow me: #jennbrownadventures
    #grievingon

    Archives

    May 2023
    April 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    May 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019

    Categories

    All
    GriefTravel
    Month 1
    Month 4
    Month 5

    RSS Feed

Have an awesome day!
Want a website like this? Contact Jenn she'll help make one for you. 
​

Have a question? E-mail us . 

  • Home
    • Send a Message
  • Grieving On
  • Jennifer Brown
  • JourneywithJosh
  • Josh Brown
  • Traveling A Browns